10 Douchebag Quotes for the Ages

Douchebags… Ah yes, the people we can’t stop talking about, but love to bash.

Sometimes they really outdo themselves with the things they say and their assholish behavior.

Amazingly, some people are famous simply for being douchebags. We could all name them, so I won’t bother wasting space just to write their douchey names.

Let’s cut to the chase and revel in their glorious stupidity with these 10 douchebag quotes for the ages.

10. Ted Stevens

ted stevens

The internet is not something you dump something on. It’s not a big truck. It’s a series of tubes.

9. R. Kelly

r kelly

Osama Bin Laden is the only one who knows exactly what I’m going through right now.

8. Ann Coulter

Liberals can believe what they want to believe, but let us not flinch from identifying liberalism as the opposition party to God.

7. Linda Evangelista

linda evangelista

It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren’t, then I’d be a school teacher.

6. William Shatner

william shatner

A pretty girl is certainly comparable to a good horse.

5. Walter Mondale – Vice President (1977-1981)

walter mondale

The idea that you can defend this nation within the constitution, under the law, and tell the truth is still considered a sort of childish, feminine position.

4. Glenn Beck

glenn beck

I love my grandfather, but I just want to slap him in the face for liking FDR – think that was one evil son of a bitch.

3. Arnold Schwarzenegger

arnold schwarzenegger

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman.

2. Dan Quayle – Vice President (1989–1993)

dan quayle

The holocaust was an obscene period in our nation’s history. I mean in this century’s history. But we all lived in this century. I didn’t live in this century.

1. Mike Tyson

mike tyson

You guys can’t define me or define my work as a father. I am many things, you know. I am many things, yeah, I am a convicted rapist, I’m a hell raiser, I’m a father – a loving father, I’m a semi-good husband, you know what I mean.

This post was inspired by The Quotable Douchebag.

— Quimosabe


  1. Wow! What a bunch of d-bags

  2. Do you know whatvdouche bag mean?

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